This month, I am circling back to my blog post written years ago, to update it with new thoughts. Truthfully, the ideas and strategies I created then have been tested hundreds of times with stunning results.
Before revisiting the advice in my original post, please note these few important ideas about relationships:
📌 Relationships are powerhouses delivering untold benefits and help for us along the path whether they “work out or last” or not. I could write an entire blog on this point alone!
📌 Expand the definition of “relationship” beyond intimate partner, or marriage partner, to include relationship with:
- Philosophical Beliefs
- Self & Beliefs about Self
📌 Basically ANYTHING that we interact with while being alive in our body on this beautiful planet, we enter into and develop a relationship with.
📌 Any successful relationship that nurtures, supports, helps to expand and grow, AND generates love and companionship, a healthy mirror, safety, etc., requires effort and commitment to remain in the relationship long enough to create these conditions. Bottom line, doesn’t happen overnight.
📌 Sometimes we need to release and break with certain relationships. See below for a fail proof method I developed to swiftly, safely, and conclusively break with something, someone, or some idea/habit that no longer serves us.
Surviving a relationship split
To be more exact:
How to survive the break up of a relationship, especially when you did not initiate or desire the split, OR YOU initiate and want such a split. Either way: Ouch!!! Painful, and causes waves and waves of grief and sadness flowing sometimes for days.
We have all experienced this state.
After one such experience where the shock was almost as bad as the pain, I refined and developed tools to help me survive and I did!
I call these practices my “Relationship Survival Kit”. Keep this kit on hand at all times!
Relationship Survival Kit:
📌 Allow all emotions, pleasant and unpleasant equally. Let them flow; have them; feel them.
📌As the initial emotional charge begins to decrease and disappear, ask the questions: “Am I ready to move on? Do I need more space and time to grieve?”
📌 Ready to move on: Practice the Relationship Triangle:
Nothing remains in the bottom line once you cut, as what you cut in that bottom line is everything that is no longer serving you; not healthy for you. Maybe this is a habit or belief, maybe this is a relationship or maybe a part of or a pattern in a relationship and not the entire relationship.
Remember it does not mean that ALL of the Relationship is cut unless of course you want that. Notice that whatever you cut with, no longer remains in the bottom line BUT you are still connected with it in the HIGHEST DIVINE so it no longer poses a problem for you, or pain for you.
📌 After the Relationship Triangle, practice the Relationship Prayer. Please note that I adapted this prayer from a Hawaiian practice:
Visualize an image of what you cut OR say its name out loud, or silently. Then speak the prayer out loud (the four sentences in a row) or silently with the intent to end the relationship. Repeat this process over and over again for 10 min.
I Forgive You.
Please Forgive Me.
I Love You.
This process brings stunning results quickly and is a fantastic tool for life. Please use freely! Also one final thought:
Know that we are beautiful Infinite Divine Beings having a human experience in a body on the planet.
No matter what it feels like going through any type of breakup, remember: “You are not broken! You are not wrong!”
We are here to gather and have experiences; some pleasant, some unpleasant. But NONE of them are bad!
I love you all!